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Image and self in therapy

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Bailey, Leila

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A sense of personal identity and continuity seems to be common to all normally functioning human beings: people speak of themselves naturally in terms of a "self" which differentiates them from others. When a person says that he is no-one, or that he does not know who he is, his expressions are generally accompanied by feelings of intense anxiety and despair. The question of how one deals with statements about the self thus quite a crucial one in therapy. Behaviourists would dismiss from the vocabulary and from therapeutic procedures precisely because it is impossible to quantify or even to define, But in clinical encounters where the self is allowed to become the subject of discussion it of some importance that the way it is understood and developed should help, rather than hinder, the therapeutic process. This essay has arisen from dissatisfaction with the view of the self as a "datum" rather than a construct(cf Walker, 1956) which appears to underlie some therapeutic methods, It particularly troublesome when counselling is focussed on situations of interpersonal conflict. This dissatisfaction rests on three observations: (a) Viewing the self as "given" introduces a large element of intransigeance into a situation where flexibility and role change are at a premium. If, for instance, I believe that I am by nature a person who needs to dominate, there is little room to manoeuvre if my partner, parent or sibling says the same thing about himself. There could be little argument against a claim that I am obeying the laws of my being. (b) Acceptance of the self as a datum opens the way in practice for insistence that there is a "true" or "real" self which may not be Manifested in behavior. I may easily come to present myself as one who is, for example, essentially kind and good, but who is being forced into anger and violence by my opponent. I may there­ fore disown my violent behaviour, claiming that my 'true' personality is essentially different, and thus cease to accept responsibility for it. (c) If I see my essential self as given, I will be wary of allowing myself to respond to the requests or the influence of others. In having my own identity to maintain against their impingements, I will be suspicious of requests for changed behaviour for fear of distorting the essential blueprint which should guide my development. Here again change is obstructed...

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